11 Steps to Start Overcoming Pornography Biblically for Life FtImg, how to overcome addiction with God, fight the new drug, how to stop addiction, God saved me from addiction, Overcome lust, Spiritual warfare, #HopeJoyInChrist

11 Steps to Start Overcoming Pornography Biblically for Life

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Have you been fighting the battle of Overcoming Pornography?  It’s a battle that feels uphill and dotted with land mines all with the purpose of sucking you back into the pit.  Thankfully in this modern technological world that tempts us to sin we also find tools and resources to help with overcoming pornography. 

These are the exact steps I used when overcoming pornography Biblically for life.  11 steps anyone can take, no matter how long you've struggled, no matter how mature in your faith you are.  You can overcome pornography… Click To Tweet

Who Needs Help Overcoming Pornography?

You may read that question and think the answer is rhetorical.  It’s not.  Who needs help overcoming pornography?  I ask because people think this is a one-sided issue.  As a wife who struggled with lust and pornography addiction I know there are many more out there suffering in silence.  

Men need help overcoming pornography addiction. 

  • Old men
  • Young men
  • Saved men
  • Lost men
  • Pastors
  • Married men
  • Single men
  • All men can be tempted by pornography

Women need victory over pornography addiction. 

  • Old women
  • Young women
  • Saved women
  • Lost women
  • Pastors/ Pastors Wives
  • Married women
  • Single women
  • All women can be tempted by pornography

Lust and sexual addiction are sins that do not discriminate.  Anyone and everyone who is exposed to 20th Century life, have the potential to be tempted down that pit of sin.  

How to Overcome Addiction

Pornography is an addiction.  

An addiction is defined as – the state of being enslaved to a habit or practice or to something that is psychologically or physically habit-forming, as narcotics, to such an extent that its cessation causes severe trauma.

Enslaved to a habit.  Even when you realized the damage the habit causes you are enslaved to it.  The habit calls your name and you are back at it before you even had time to process the choice.  

When thinking about pornography you must keep in mind that it is an addiction.  

How do you overcome addiction? 

  1. Know Biblical Truth
  2. Humble Yourself Before God
  3. Know That Biblical Weapons are Available
  4. Take Every Thought Captive
  5. Put on The Full Armor Of God
  6. Research Additional Tools
  7. Find a Trustworthy Supportive Community
  8. Realize Overcoming Pornography is Tough Work
  9. Admit Pornography Hurts Marriage
  10. Pray through the process
  11. Add Fasting to Prayer
    • Bonus Step: Praise When Temptation Overwhelms You

11 Steps to Start Overcoming Pornography Biblically for Life PInIt, how to overcome addiction with God, fight the new drug, how to stop addiction, God saved me from addiction, Overcome lust, Spiritual warfare, #HopeJoyInChrist

How Do You Overcome Addiction With God?  

To fight the new drug of addiction you need a solid foundation faith.  You can find freedom from lust and pornography! 

How do you overcome addiction with God?  

1. Know Biblical Truth

God has a design and purpose for sex. 

The Bible teaches that the only acceptable sexuality happens between a husband and his wife in the confines of their covenant marriage relationship.  

Anything that happens outside of God’s design for sexual intimacy is sin.  

  • Lustful thoughts about anyone besides your spouse. 
  • Watching others have sex
  • Reading about others having sex
  • Premarital sex
  • Extramarital sex
  • And anything in-between

Knowing Biblical truth is the first step.  You can’t fight to defend or redeem what you do not know.  

2. Humble Yourself Before God

The trust is that knowing the details of God’s design for your sexuality is not enough to overcome pornography or lust or sexual addiction… or any other sin I’ve ever faced for that matter.  Who else?  

If you are a Christian – a born again child of God – once you know God’s design you feel that conviction every time you act outside of God’s design.  

When you feel that Holy Spirit conviction of sin you have a choice.  You can pridefully excuse your sin and harden your heart or you can humbly confess the sin and ask God to help you repent and turn from it.  

3. Know the Biblical Weapons

Praise the Lord, He doesn’t leave us to figure out how to overcome addiction Biblically alone!  God gives us the gift of the Holy Spirit and the power of prayer, Scripture, and community to help us fight back against the temptations when they come.  And they will come!

“No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.” (1 Corinthians 10:13 NASB)

God gives us powerful weapons for spiritual warfare.  And sin issues are spiritual warfare issues

Biblical Weapons to Overcome Pornography

There are great tools to overcome pornography but don’t forget that God has given us Biblical weapons for overcoming any sin.  ANY SIN can be addressed Biblically.  

The two best Biblical weapons for overcoming sin issues deal with your mind.  Get your mind straight with God’s Word and you are well on your way for a life of purity.  

  1. Take sinful thoughts captive
  2. Put on the Armor of God
  3. Find the right tools for accountability and purity and use them consistently

4. Take Sinful Thoughts Captive

“For though we walk in the flesh, we do not war according to the flesh, for the weapons of our warfare are not of the flesh, but divinely powerful for the destruction of fortresses. We are destroying speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ, and we are ready to punish all disobedience, whenever your obedience is complete.” (2 Corinthians 10:3-6 NASB)

God tells us we have powerful weapons to take our thoughts captive.  We don’t always have a choice about how or when they come into our minds but we can choose what to do when they enter. 

Take a day to examine all of your thoughts and see which lead you down the path to lust.  That pathway to lust drives the addiction to pornography.  

When I first began this process I kept a journal and prayed over each thought pattern that led to sin.  It was intense but so powerful!

Once you know the thoughts that are out of line with God’s design you can begin intentionally replacing them!

We’ve done a study of Philippians 4:8 before but a quick review:

“Finally, brethren, whatever is truewhatever is honorablewhatever is justwhatever is purewhatever is lovelywhatever is of good reputeif there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things” (Philippians 4:8 NASB)

5. Put on the Armor of God

Taking captive and replacing our ungodly thoughts is a continual challenge.  The challenge gets easier when we make a habit of facing each day ready for the battle.  

Each day you must spend time putting on the armor of God.  What is the armor?

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of His might. Put on the full armor of God, so that you will be able to stand firm against the schemes of the devil…” (Ephesians 6:10-19 NASB)

The pieces of the armor:

  • Belt of Truth
  • Breastplate of Righteousness
  • Shoes of Peace
  • Helmet of Salvation
  • Shield of Faith
  • Sward of the Spirit
  • Prayer

Learn more about the Armor of God here.

With your armor on you are ready to use extra tools and overcome pornography addiction!

6. Find the Tools for Right Accountability and Purity

When I began facing this addiction in my life I started with the free tools. 

  1. Enable maturity features
    • Every PC has features for maturity. 
    • Set the maturity to PG or PG13
  2. Password Protection
    • You can also set a password for anything X rated or NR.
    • PRO TIP: Ask someone else to set the password for accountability.  
  3. Household Accountability
    • Share a google account with the whole house so that everything you view shows up for the entire household.

Those are the first three tools I used to overcome pornography and they went a long way toward victory.  As my husband joined the commitment to keep pornography out of the house we needed more resources. 

These are the tools I recommend: Resources to Overcome Pornography from the Life of a Real Wife

7. Find a Safe Community to Overcome Pornography

Whether you are looking for tools to help yourself overcome pornography or you are figuring out how to deal with a husband’s addiction you need a community.  

Learning how to stop addiction is tricky and emotional. 

If you are the addict you can expect to face dopamine withdrawal symptoms and you will need support and tools to help in the journey.

If you are the spouse of an addict you can expect irritability, withdrawal, and possibly rationalization and manipulation.  

I remember clearly one conversation during the struggle when he was trying to convince me of the positive effects of watching pornography for our marriage. 

Communities to help with pornography addiction: 

Have The Right Mindset to Overcome Pornography

Knowing the who and why of sexual addiction and lust are important.  Learning to use Biblical weapons and find the additional tools are key.  While you are using both pieces in your battle with overcoming pornography you will have setbacks and struggles.  It is critical to have the right mindset going into the fight.  

  • Finding freedom from lust is tough
  • Lust in any form hurts your marriage
You can overcome the sin of lust.   Know Biblical Truth Humble Yourself Before God Know That Biblical Weapons are Available Take Every Thought Captive Put on The Full Armor Of God Research Additional Tools Find a… Click To Tweet

8. Learning How to Stop Watching Pornography is Tough

Let me say it again.  Learning how to stop watching pornography is tough.   Now there are some who say they stopped cold turkey.  Good job.  That’s amazing.  I would argue that they may not have really been addicted, but regardless that is amazing.  

Cold turkey didn’t work for me.  It took a lot of Holy Spirit given will power, vulnerability, and grace.  

I failed time and time again.  God met me where I failed.  The Holy Spirit gave me the strength to get back up and try again.  Eventually the desire to watch left.  

If God can do that for me I know He can do that for you.  You can have victory over lust and pornography!

9. Pornography in Marriage is Dangerous

Something I will talk about at length in another post is that lust is among the things that destroy a marriage.  Pornography In marriage is dangerous.  You may think it will help spice things up but it will actually lead to disappointment, discontentment, and disinterest.

Disappointment because pornography is imitation intimacy that neither of you can recreate.  

Discontentment because we believe the lie and wish we had the imitation all the while missing the blessing of pleasure God designed in reality.

Disinterest because when neither of you measures up to the unrealistic expectations of pornography you will give up even trying.

Pornography has been linked to ED in men, PE in men, and a host of libido distinction in women.  

Pornography in marriage is a dangerous threat to all that God designed sexual intimacy to be in marriage.  

Don’t fall for the enemy’s lies!  Flee sexual immorality.  

Related: Is Virtual Infidelity a Ground for Divorce?*

Prayer, Praise, and Fasting to End Your Battle With Porn Addiction

You read that right.  Prayer is a powerful weapon in our Spiritual arsenal as Christians.  We all battle sin.  Lust is just another sin in the list that any of us could face in a lifetime.  Prayer is how we connect with God, access the power of the Holy Spirit within us, and through that power overcome sin.  

Fasting then deepens that connection with God strengthens that power, and gets after the deeper roots of the sin in ways nothing else could.  Fasting with prayer is a tag team punch to overcome any sin in our lives!  

Related: How to Fast and Pray in a Way That Pleases God

And finally, praise is my go-to tool in the moment of temptation.  

10. Can I Pray for You to Begin Overcoming Pornography Biblically?

Dear Heavenly Father, 

Many of us have fallen for the temptation of lust.  Lust led us to pornography which was more powerful and addicting that we ever imagined.  Forgive us, Father.  

We need YOUR help to overcome pornography addiction. 

  1. Teach us your truths about the design for sexual intimacy.  
  2. Humble us when we fail.
  3. Remind us to train in and apply the weapons for Spiritual Warfare.

Thank YOU, Father, for giving us so many tools to overcome this addiction as well as every other type of sin!  

  • Train us to think godly thoughts continually.
  • Remind us to put on the Whole Armor of God.
  • Give us wisdom in selecting additional Biblical resources.

We thank YOU today for the victory we know we will have and we will give YOU all the honor and glory as we walk the journey to recovery. 

In Jesus Name.

Amen

11. Have You Tried to Fast and Pray to Overcome Pornography?

Fasting is a bit off-putting in our culture, but Jesus said Christians would fast.  The Bible is filled with stories about real people facing real problems they couldn’t handle alone.  When they added a time of fasting things changed.  God stepped in and saved nations from annihilation, healed sickness, restored kingdoms, gave visions and so much more. 

Fasting is powerful in that it helps you humble yourself before God like nothing else.  When you are humbled before God you are inviting HIM to do a work in your life that will change everything.  

Not sure how to get started fasting?  I wrote a very short book to help.  

A Beginners Guide to Pray and Fast: Taking Spiritual Warfare to the Next Level by Tiffany Montgomery. Check it out today!

Bonus Step: Praise Defeats Temptation in the Moment

The last step to overcoming pornography and lust and just about any other sin issue that helps me is praise.  When the temptation is coming at me so hard and nothing else is helping… I mean I am replacing thoughts with scripture and praying and reaching out to my accountability partner… and still, the temptation is on my back.  Praise breaks through for the victory!

I keep several playlists on YouTube for just this reason.  When temptation won’t relent I turn on a praise song and blare it louder than the lust.  I sing and dance and lose myself in worship.  Our neighbors probably think I am a crazy lady, but I refuse to live in slavery to this sin. 

Can I challenge you today?  Create a playlist on YouTube with some upbeat Christian songs that you love.  It could be Hillsong or Lecrae, Travis Cottrell, or Tauren Wells.  What matters is that you enjoy the songs and they are clearly praising God.  Do it now while you are thinking about it.  

The next time you feel like you can’t resist the temptation set a timer on your phone for 10 minutes and then turn the praise on.  Just that short pause can be enough to short circuit the temptation and bring you victory!  And I’m here to tell you it’s hard to zone out in lust when you just worshiped Jesus.

11 Steps to Begin Overcoming Pornography Biblically Today

These are the exact steps I used when overcoming pornography Biblically for life.  11 steps anyone can take, no matter how long you’ve struggled, no matter how mature in your faith you are.  You can overcome pornography addiction.  You can overcome the sin of lust.  

  1. Know Biblical Truth
  2. Humble Yourself Before God
  3. Know That Biblical Weapons are Available
  4. Take Every Thought Captive
  5. Put on The Full Armor Of God
  6. Research Additional Tools
  7. Find a Trustworthy Supportive Community
  8. Realize Overcoming Pornography is Tough Work
  9. Admit Pornography Hurts Marriage
  10. Pray through the process
  11. Add Fasting to Prayer
    • Bonus Step: Praise When Temptation Overwhelms You

Which step can you start with today?  

in HIM,

If you enjoyed this you will love these posts:


 

Tiffany Montgomery

Tiffany of Hope Joy in Christ inspires Christian Women to grow in faith, live out Biblical Marriage Principles and raise Godly Children.  Join the Wives Only Facebook Group here or keep up with her through Pinterest.

2 thoughts to “11 Steps to Start Overcoming Pornography Biblically for Life”

  1. I applaud your honesty and openness to reach out and help others who are struggling with addiction to pornography, very comprehensive article. #Grace & Truth, How to know what is most important, link-up

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