There was a day Hubby came home (earlier than I expected) easily provoked and in a foul mood -angry about something at work.
My day had been filled with whining and screaming and more messes than I can count.
Something irritated Hubby about the condition of the living room (probably the disaster of crushed cheerio’s that magically appear most days) and he picks a fight with me about it.
I could quickly see that he was right – this time – and I was going to lose this fight. But I had lost one too many fights this particular day and I needed to “win” something. I switched gears mid-argument, bringing up something he had done in the past that was far worse.
That one phrase caught him off guard and I scored a shallow victory at that moment…
You see, I know exactly what will upset my husband and how to push his buttons to win an argument. Can you relate?
Today we will see that Love does not provoke him to anger to win…
we both lose that way even if I “win” that argument.
Who Said Love is Patient and Kind?
For our study, we are looking at 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
“Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act disrespectfully or unbecomingly; it does not seek it’s own, is not provoked to anger, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness but rejoices with the truth;bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, enduring all things. Love never fails.”
What does it mean that Love is not Easily Provoked
1. Love does not make the other angry without a reason and 2. Love gives up that anger for reconciliation.
#1 sounds like clean fighting to me…
Do you fight clean or are you like me and love to win the battle even if it means you lose the war?
That is one side of this word Provoked, let’s examine its flip side.
#2 Love gives up Anger for Reconciliation
Have you been hurt in your Christian Marriage? I have. There came a time I had to assess the hurt.
Was it a small injury, a deep wound, or just an offense?
I don’t know about you, but I can be easily offended by his:
- Unintentional comments
Probably the same way he is offended by all that in me.
It’s so important to not be easily offended. I have to remind myself to accept that others fail… just like I do – and need grace.
“For a righteous man falls seven times, and rises again.” Proverbs 24:16
Loving my husband means I choose to forgive
When I forgive him I choose to give up my anger (get over my hurt feelings) so we can be reconciled. Letting go of that anger helps me not be so easily provoked the next time he messes up 😉
Can I be real with you here? I had a real hard time with this bit. May I share my story of Forgiveness with you in this Free Challenge?
I was injured by my husband.
- There have been times in our past where he has used words to hurt me.
- Times where his ego clashed with my pride and he won.
- There have been times where he has reacted badly and hurt my feelings.
Those things are normal when you spend as much time together as we do in our biblical Marriage!
My Husband wounded me deeply
I hope you get a chance to read through my testimony in the E-book about forgiving. There have been several circumstances where Hubby has deeply wounded me.
- Calculated decisions on his part that forever changed our lives.
I was sure our Marriage would fall apart… But God intervened and changed everything. Today I can honestly say I have forgiven him and we know Hope and Joy in our marriage.
It is possible. Do you believe that?
You can always reach out to me if you need an ear to talk to or someone to pray with you through a difficult season in your Christian Marriage.
Marriage Challenge: Assess the hurt
Spend some time praying over the hurt you feel.
Ask God to show you if it is a result of:
- Being too easily offended
- A small hurt done to you
- A deep injury in your Marriage
Write it out. Begin praying over it. Ask God to show you how to give up your anger and forgive.
anger in marriage – 170
What anger does to a marriage? Can anger destroy a marriage? What are 3 types of marriage? How do I get rid of my husband’s anger?
What does the Bible say about anger in marriage? dealing with anger in marriage, managing anger in marriage, resentment and anger in marriage, how to deal with anger in marriage, how to control anger in marriage,