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3 Powerful Ways to Reclaim Joy in a Difficult Marriage

Whether your marriage issue is small and easily resolved or a full-blown, difficult, heart-breaking, family-destroying crisis, you know that it feels nearly impossible to Reclaim joy in the midst of painful marriage moments.

How can we possibly experience real joy in the face of real suffering?

Wives who have lived through a difficult season understand the heavy burden of ongoing marriage problems and the grief that accompanies that burden.  Even women who are determined to be warrior wives, who fight for marriage like only women of faith can feel the weight of the battle.

Where is joy when you’re weary and in need of rest?

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Here are 3 Powerful Ways to Reclaim Joy in a Difficult Marriage

1. Recognize progress in a Difficult Christian Marriage.

One strategy Satan uses often to discourage me in a rough patch is the sneaky little lie that my marriage will always be difficult.  He tries to convince me and you, too, that things will never change.

If you believe that you are doomed to repeat the same mistakes, to remain stuck in the same destructive patterns, then where is your hope? What motivation do you have to keep working toward a healthy marriage?  3 Powerful Ways to Reclaim Joy

Do you see how that works, friend? Believing those lies saps us of our strength!

Do you need some encouragement to keep pressing into that Daily Commitment?   We could all use a community to help us in Reclaiming Hope & Joy in our marriages!

We just finished a 31 day Series to help us Reclaim Hope & Joy in Marriage by Intentionally Investing in our Christian Marriage.

Get the articles Free in this downloadable e-Book.  And Be sure to check out the Wives Only FB Group where Christian Wives chose Hope and Joy in every Season

Fight back against the Enemy’s lies and reclaim your hope and joy in the Lord by learning how to recognize progress.

Yes, maybe today even basic communication felt like nails on a chalkboard, but was it as bad as a few months ago? How about a few years ago?

Philippians 1:6 For I am confident of this very thing, that He who began a good work in you will perfect it until the day of Christ Jesus.

Ask the Lord to help you see the ways in which your marriage relationship is changing, no matter how small or seemingly insignificant. Claim the promise of Philippians 1:6 for yourself, and if your husband is a believer, then claim it for him, too.

He began the work, and He will complete it!  Quit believing the lie that your marriage is doomed.

2. Rest in knowing who wins the war in a Difficult Marriage.

When a husband or wife struggles with a stronghold sin, one that continually crops up and wreaks havoc, the other spouse tends to despair. After all, we’re dealing with the same old issues we’ve always been dealing with.

Along with learning to recognize progress, we must also learn to rest in the God who is in control. We may never experience complete victory over sin and struggles here on this Earth, but we can rest in the fact that in the end, God wins.

The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it. John 1:5 (NIV)

At this moment, you might believe Satan is winning the battle, but God claims the ultimate victory – for those who trust in Jesus, He WILL win the war.

You’ve heard the phrase, “The joy of the Lord is my strength.”

Let that be your battle cry, warrior wife!

Reclaim your joy.

I know I know, it takes more than just changing our thinking.  If you are in a difficult Christian Marriage and need to dig deeper be sure to check out The Full Marriage Course Finding Hope and Joy in my Marriage in the HopeJoyInChrist Shop!

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3. Rejoice in the fact that this world is not our home.

Something about persistent suffering wears a person down and makes us heartsick. Under the weight of suffering, we easily fall prey to the “woe is me” attitude, much like the prophet Jonah or the Israelites.

Perhaps the only good that comes from feeling the weight of sin and the weight of living in this broken-down world with its broken-down relationships is that it makes us yearn for Heaven.

My work-in-progress friend, please remember that this world is not your home.

Yes, it’s hard to live life here.

Faith doesn’t always come easy.

We don’t always get the miracles we ask for.

And denying self is so much harder than it sounds.

But this is not our home, hallelujah!

He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away. Revelation 21:4

One day, the Bridegroom WILL return for us, and all of the weight and darkness of this world will fall away.

Sorrow will be no more.

Suffering shall see its end.

We’ll see Jesus face to face.

If nothing else, reclaim joy in a difficult marriage by recognizing that one day, this too will pass.

One day, your joy will be complete.


Is Joy missing in your life?  Need a guide to help get it back?  I’d love to give you this Free 30 Day Reading Guide to help.

If you loved this, be sure to check out Being Confident of This and her book: Hope for the Hurting Wife

  • Hope for the Hurting Wife is a thirty-day devotional journey that meets hurting and heartbroken wives right in the midst of a difficult marriage and gently encourages them to find hope that truly lasts. Rebekah and Jen know many wives truly wish to avoid divorce, but the pain and suffering experienced when marriage doesn’t go as planned are very real. Through personal stories of heartache and scriptural insight, they address topics such as: Moving forward after trauma
    Loving even when you feel unloved
    Protecting your heart
    Understanding the power of choice
    Trusting God while waiting for redemption
    Hope. Courage. Confidence. It’s never too late to experience these realities, even in a troubled marriage!

Hope for the Hurting Wife - Christian Marriage Book, Biblical Wifehood Resource


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Jen Stults

Wife to a church planter and mother of four, Jen is a work-in-progress woman who seeks to find confidence in Christ alone. As a disciple-maker, author, and speaker, she encourages women who feel frustrated by failure and plagued by perfectionism to find both freedom and confidence in their identity in Christ. She writes about the struggle to embrace everyday grace at her blog, Being Confident of This.