Oh Hi! I’m Tiffany.
Would you agree that Marriage can be hard?
Bud and I had no idea how to do Marriage well.
We met during my divorce. Even in the hurt of that season, I was sure Marriage was the answer to my lonely broken heart. It wasn’t.
Marriage brought two messy hearts together… and it was hard.
We spent years hopelessly searching for marriage help. Many people offered what I would call “cultural marriage advice”.
- Marriage should be 50/50.
- Respect has to be earned.
- A woman can do anything a man can do – only better
- Always be available for sex or he’ll go somewhere else for it
What a mess all that advice made!!!!!!!!
Even well-meaning Christians gave this same marriage advice. But then, most of the Christians around us were also getting divorced… so we didn’t know what to do.
I turned to books. It was easy to find bits and pieces of advice here and there! But it was hard to piece them all together and apply the changes in real ways.
Then came the day I was sure this marriage was over.
The only person I have any control over in this marriage- is me.
Change starts with me!
The Power of a Praying Wife was the first book that made a difference!
In truth: I never thought divorce would hurt so deeply.
Marriage is hard, but divorce is harder.
That’s right; God had plans to change me.
Enter another book – Fascinating Womanhood.
- I wanted to burn it every other paragraph!
- I’ve never wanted to stop reading a book so badly in my life.
- I even rationalized setting it down because it does not conform itself completely to my faith!
AGH! It began to change every part of my wifehood.
Each chapter seemed to peel me apart like skinning a live bear. I tried each idea on Bud. Then cried because they worked! Every last backward, outdated, archaic idea worked. These things were opening my husband up.
He began to talk to me about real things.
We were connecting as he began to share his soul with me again.
He started helping me around the house and showing love toward me for the first time in years.
An eye-opening -aha- moment.
I learned that I had been doing marriage like the culture around me. God began showing me how wrong the cultural standard for Marriage is.
How had it never occurred to me that God has a way to do Marriage?
God’s way is so different from the culture we live in!
He is teaching me to think differently:
- To ask “Is that the Cultural advice or is it what the Bisays say about being a godly wife?”
- Be willing to let go of any thinking and acting that the Bible speaks against.
- To willingly embrace God’s way- no matter how hard it seems.
- God’s way is always worth it!
Do you need some encouragement in this season of your Christian Marriage?
We could all use help to Reclaim Hope & Joy in Marriage by Intentionally Investing in our Wifehood.
Each Monday I am going to share some practical tips and encouragement. #MarriageMonday
These are the things that have radically changed my marriage.
Who is this Marriage Course for?
- Are you a wife worried that your Christian Marriage is not going to survive?
- Do you feel hopeless, joyless or miserable in your Marriage?
- Are you a wife – unsure what your role is in your Christian Marriage?
- Do you struggle to connect as a couple anymore?
- Do you feel trapped?
- Have you tried everything and nothing has helped our Marriage?
- Are you thinking or talking about divorce?
Whatever season of Christian Marriage I find myself in, it seems easy to forget that God’s way and the Culture’s way are different.