Every day I make a choice about whether I will be an encourager, discourager or silent partner in my marriage. My deepest desire is to encourage my husband to be the man God created him to be at home and at work. How about you? Do you intentionally choose your attitude each morning? If so, you will discover how it can guide and help you through the hardest moments of the day.
Our husbands face battles every day before, during and after work. They need us to inspire and uplift them to continue the daily fight.
I have learned over the years how important it is for me to develop and practice being an encourager to sustain joy in my marriage.
What is an encourager?
Webster’s New Collegiate Dictionary defines encourage as the following: “The act of inspiring others with renewed courage, renewed spirit or renewed hope.”
I like to describe an encourager as one who also comes alongside and cheers another person on to good deeds and becoming the person God created them to be.
3 Practical Ways to Be an Encourager for our Husband
1. Pause and Pray for Positive words.
- Pause: Listen to God and your husband.
- Pray: Ask God to give to you the correct Positive words to build up and not tear down. (He gets enough of that at work)
You may be interested in a Free Download 60 Words of Encouragement available on my website.
2. Plant encouragement in his heart, mind, and soul.
After we pause and pray, the next step is to intentionally plant encouraging and positive words deep in your husband’s heart.
Go ahead. SAY it out loud.
Not a text – Not just a note – Not only a phone call.
All of those things are good things but not the best thing. Make sure he hears it directly from your mouth with a smile and a tender heart.
Do you need help finding Things to Say to Appreciate Him (Things that he will hear as respect and Love?) Check out these Words of Appreciation Cards in the HopeJoyInChrist Shop!
I want to emphasize a smile. Be genuine, kind and authentic.
God created all of us with a need for love and appreciation. What a blessing when your husband feels like he has his very own cheerleader at home. It doesn’t matter what he has to face at work, he will have peace knowing his wife is on his team and cheering him on.
Proverbs 3:27 “Do not withhold good from those who deserve it when it’s in your power to help them.”
3. Potential not Problems.
Encouragers see potential while others only see problems.
This is crucial for our marriage to thrive. We need to see the potential in our husband at home, in the marriage, and at work.
When our husband has no one else supporting his ideas or plans for the future, we can step up and encourage him. Acknowledge his potential in Christ and watch him rise up to be the man God created him to be.
Recognize his gifts and talents.
We can’t deny every marriage has problems, sin, and obstacles to overcome but we need to focus on the positive.
If you are like me, you may be thinking, “Great! But, who is going to encourage me? How do I continually fulfill the role of encourager for my husband and family when I need to encourage myself?”
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The best answer I can give you is simply to turn to God’s Word. I’m always encouraged by scripture. I’m a testimony to the hope we find in Christ and the Word. I’ve personally experienced encouragement from God, throughout my 38 years of marriage with the promises in the Bible. Here are just two of my favorites:
As I encourage others, I am encouraged.
Proverbs 11:25 “The generous will prosper; those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed.”
When I need encouraged I tell myself the truth through verses, praise music, and prayer.
1 Samuel 30:6 “but David encouraged himself in the Lord His God.”
Make time each day to thank the Lord for your husband and reclaim joy in your Christian Marriage. A grateful heart is a good medicine for a joyful soul. Don’t miss your blessing. Some women take their husband for granted and miss the blessing of the Lord.
If we choose to appreciate, encourage and uplift our husbands, we will experience the blessing of grace:
Ephesians 4:29 “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”
May you start each day with a heart to encourage and words that uplift your husband and family. Will, you become an encourager and reclaim joy in your Christian marriage today? The choice is yours!
Jayme is a wife, mother, and grandmother who is passionate about encouraging and mentoring the next generation to walk close to the Lord and connect with other believers. Learn more at http://www.JaymeLeeHull.com
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I want to show encouragement to him today and just learn to laugh more together!