How can we make sure there is more room for God to speak, direct, and move in our lives? That is the question God has prompted throughout our world in this season. The answer God has been putting in my heart is to begin walking in the grace of God.
My problem with that is, grace feels like a weak word and I have been resisting. So of course He has put podcasts and sermons and verses about grace in my path nonstop until I have relented and dug deeper.
Stay to the end to see a video where I go more in-depth about fasting and prayer!
“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.” (2 Corinthians 12:9 NASB)
Why Not Start Walking in The Grace Of God?
Through this verse, He challenged me to start walking in the Grace of God rather than stumbling around in my own weakness. That verse puzzles me and challenges me so that I can’t get it out of my mind. I am weak, though I work to be strong. Does God really want me to be weak? Should I be happy that I am weak?
Grace is a far cry from my normal goals. I long to be more perfect, and successful, to finish strong, do all I set out to do, and be loved by others.
If I am honest, a woman of grace doesn’t sound like all those things.
A gracious woman sounds like a weak woman, a woman who never gets her own way, a woman who has no rights or voice of her own. She feels like a mousy woman always getting walked on by others.
As God pushed in with this topic, my response was, “Lord, I don’t want to look weak.”
As I looked at the call to live graciously in Scripture, I was surprised to see that my picture of grace is not Biblical.
What Does The Grace of God Mean
The truth is, I didn’t understand what grace was and often confused it with mercy.
What is grace? Blue Letter Bible defines grace as the unmerited favor of God poured out to us leading to salvation.
Related: 50 Bible Verses About Acceptance of Others
What Is The Spiritual Meaning Of Grace?
What is grace spiritually? When I think of grace I think of the character of God. That’s probably why grace and mercy are tied together in my mind. God shows both so often and both feel so out of my reach at times.
Mercy – Not getting what I deserve.
In God’s mercy, He forgave my sins.
Grace – Getting what I could never deserve.
Through God’s grace, He saved me, adopted me, and made me a co-heir with Jesus Christ.
How can we make sure there is more room for God to speak, direct, and move in our lives? That is the question God has prompted throughout our world in this season. The answer God has been putting in my heart is to begin walking… Click To TweetHow Do We Obtain God’s Grace
If we just glance at this definition, grace still feels passive. We obtain grace from God or others. If we look closer, however, we see there is an active strength required to obtain grace.
Getting what I could never deserve.
- Getting grace requires action.
- I have to accept grace.
- Knowing that I can never deserve grace requires action.
- I have to stop trying to earn grace.
Accepting and not striving are very active processes – at least in my life.
Walking in the grace of God is not a passive thing. Living by grace requires action. In fact, looking at the action required tells me that a weak person could never live by grace.
A woman of grace then must be a very strong person. Walking in the grace of God is something any of us can do if we take a few steps.
- Understand God’s divine grace.
- Allow God to change what He wants.
- Accept grace daily.
- Allow grace to mature through practice.
- Release the need to control.
- Spend more time with God in prayer and Bible study and prayer.
- Live openly in the community with the body of Christ.
What Does it Mean To Walk in God’s Grace?
The Bible talks about grace 159 times in the New Testament (Charis) and 64 times in the Old Testament (Hen).
With so many scriptures on grace, we see this topic is important to God.
These are things that stand out to me about Grace, as a character trait of God that we have access to through the power of the Holy Spirit living in us.
First, let’s look at divine Grace, then we will look at the Spiritual gift of grace.
Divine Grace
“For by grace you have been saved through faith; and that not of yourselves, it is the gift of God; not as a result of works, so that no one may boast.” (Ephesians 2:8-9 NASB)
What is divine grace? God’s divine grace saves us, but it does so much more in fact! It also sanctifies us and justifies us. Understanding God’s divine grace and how that flows from His character will help us better understand how to live by grace and walk-in grace ourselves.
God Justifies Us Through Grace
“for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, being justified as a gift by His grace through the redemption which is in Christ Jesus” (Romans 3:23-24 NASB)
Justification means God covers our sins. When God looks at us – after salvation- He sees us through His perfect son. I think of it sort of like a camera filter. You can take a picture of yourself or you could pick a cute filter and look like an elf or a kitten. With the filter on you don’t see just you, you see you plus something.
Through justification, God doesn’t see me in all my sin. God sees me covered by the blood of Christ poured out to pay for my sin. He sees me spotless and righteous and holy just like Jesus.
“Justification is God’s righteous act of removing the guilt and penalty of sin while, at the same time, declaring the ungodly to be righteous, through faith in Christ’s atoning sacrifice.”
Allowing God to justify you requires a strong woman confident in Her God.
Without walking in the grace of God, a woman will continue to try to fix herself up until she feels perfect enough to stand before God.
A strong woman will come as she is, confident in her identity and position in Christ, knowing she will never be perfect in her own strength and she doesn’t have to be.
God Sanctifies Us Through Grace
“Pursue peace with all men, and the sanctification without which no one will see the Lord.” (Hebrews 12:14 NASB)
“And now I commend you to God and to the word of His grace, which is able to build you up and to give you the inheritance among all those who are sanctified.” (Acts 20:32 NASB)
Sanctification is about walking with God, staying open to allow Him to change you through life to be more like Him.
“Christian Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.”
This feels weak because you don’t sanctify yourself.
There are Christians who refuse to change, refuse to give God control of their lives. They tend to be miserable fighting God in life. I have been one in many seasons so I can testify to that.
Allowing change requires strength. Change is hard, but God is trustworthy. Giving Him control takes strength! It takes a strong woman of grace to walk by faith in God with open hands allowing God to change her as He sees fit.
Walking Willingly in Divine Grace Requires Strength
Both justification and sanctification refer to a change God is working in our hearts, minds, and souls making us into His image. We are becoming holy as He is holy through the work of Grace in our lives.
It’s a beautiful transformation that requires our willing co-operation! We get stuck when we refuse His grace, refuse change, hold ourselves to too high a standard or wallow in guilt and shame over our mistakes.
How Should We Respond to God’s Gift of Grace?
Instead of fighting grace, we must accept and respond to God’s gift of grace! God changes us through his divine grace, but He also fills us with His grace and calls us to extend grace to others following His example.
“But by the grace of God I am what I am, and His grace toward me did not prove vain; but I labored even more than all of them, yet not I, but the grace of God with me.” (1 Corinthians 15:10 NASB)
We see in 1 Corinthians 15:10 that God fills us with the Holy Spirit (also called the Holy Spirit of grace in Hebrews 10:29) and that filling compels us to live by and extend grace.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9 NASB)
Then we see that God’s gift of grace gives us the power to live the Christian life-embracing and extending more grace even though we are actually very weak.
We should respond to God’s grace in two ways.
- Accepting God’s grace ourselves daily.
- Extending grace to others daily.
Accepting God’s Grace
Accepting grace daily should be no problem because we have grace living in us! … but it is. How can we more easily accept grace? I see two ways that come from Ephesians 4:7.
“But to each one of us grace was given according to the measure of Christ’s gift.” (Ephesians 4:7 NASB)
1. See Grace As A Gift
Knowing that God gives us the Holy Spirit to indwell us and that He is the Spirit of Grace means I am not adding stress to God when I need His grace.
- He won’t think less of me for asking for Grace.
- My need for grace won’t take grace from others needier than me.
- In fact, He already gave it to me, I just need to accept it.
If I believed and reminded myself of those truths it would help me embrace God’s grace instead of proving my worth.
To refuse to accept His grace would be like refusing to eat for a week while there is plenty of food in the cupboard. It would be a pointless waste, making me weaker for no good reason!
2. Wait For Grace To Mature
If seeing grace as a spiritual gift is how we begin accepting grace, understanding how gifts mature is the next step.
If grace is a spiritual gift I know it will mature just like the other gifts mature over time the more it is accepted and used.
- To refuse to accept the gift of grace would delay grace maturing in me.
- Refusing to extend grace to others would also delay grace maturing in me.
I only hurt myself by trying to walk in my own strength (which the Bible calls weakness) and demanding that others do the same.
Characteristics of a Woman of Grace Who Gives Grace
What does it mean to be a woman of grace who extends grace to others?
As we embrace the idea of becoming women of grace we must throw off the weak worldly picture of grace and step into the biblical picture of grace.
What does it mean to show grace to someone?
A woman of grace, living by grace, walking in the grace of God is strong as she imitates her strong God
Yes, grace involves giving up your rights and serving others. It takes a powerful woman, confident in WHOSE she is to give up her rights and desires in order to love others well.
To see the characteristics of a woman of grace we must look at some Bible verses about living by grace.
What gives me hope is that Scriptures on grace are often paired with powerful things proving that living in and extending grace to others is actually living from a position of strength.
Grace and Truth
“And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us, and we saw His glory, glory as of the only begotten from the Father, full of grace and truth.” (John 1:14 NASB)
A woman of grace lives a life of truth, not hiding from the hard things but giving them to God.
God is truthful, He encourages us while also correcting us. A woman of grace does the same, not avoiding confrontation but also not beating people up with the truth.
Grace and Power
“And Stephen, full of grace and power, was performing great wonders and signs among the people.” (Acts 6:8 NASB)
A woman of grace has access to all the power of God at work within her. We have each been given gifts from God and when we identify and live in those gifts and callings we can do amazing things in the Kingdom of God.
This is not about perfection. The power of God at work in us, often comes through weakness, foolishness and imperfection, pointing others to God, making disciples, teaching, and maturing believers.
It takes a strong woman to allow the power of God to work in her toward heavenly goals often at the expense of earthly goals.
Grace and Confidence
“Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” (Hebrews 4:16 NASB)
I love that God took the first step toward us and then gave us permission to step toward Him continually with boldness. Grace gives us boldness and confidence to approach God rather than trying to deal with life alone or fix our problems alone.
Walking in the grace of God in strength demands that we come to Him with confidence every time there is a decision to make or a problem to fix.
A strong woman of God knows she is strong only when walking in the will of God and in the strength of God.
Grace Masters Sin
“For sin shall not be master over you, for you are not under law but under grace.” (Romans 6:14 NASB)
Living in grace is not living perfectly. We will never be sin-free. Never. While grace doesn’t free us from the temptation to sin, it does give us access to the power of God to help us resist sin as we boldly come before Him with every need and decision.
Do you see how these things build on each other? As we get to know God, understanding Whose we are we are more able to grow in the gift of grace from a place of strength.
Grace and Service
“As each one has received a special gift, employ it in serving one another as good stewards of the manifold grace of God.” (1 Peter 4:10 NASB)
It takes very little effort to worry about and work toward our own goals, dreams, and desires. We can do that almost without thinking each day.
A strong woman of grace serves others, uses her gifts and talents to help them get further in the journey than they could have gotten alone.
It may feel like serving others will take time away from reaching your own goals, but in reality, you grow so much faster by serving others. This is one of those things you need to just try and see how God multiplies back the blessing of serving.
Grace and Humility
“But He gives a greater grace. Therefore it says, “God is opposed to the proud, but gives grace to the humble.”” (James 4:6 NASB)
Pride is the enemy I know well. Pride refuses to ask for help, hides its flaws, pretends nothing is wrong, and ignores the hard things in life.
Humility, on the other hand, asks for help, accepts imperfection, shows others where there are mistakes, and faces the hard things knowing God is right there.
It takes a strong person to walk in humility through grace before God.
Grace and Giving
“But just as you abound in everything, in faith and utterance and knowledge and in all earnestness and in the love we inspired in you, see that you abound in this gracious work (of giving) also.” (2 Corinthians 8:7 ( NASB emphasis mine)
Just as grace serves others, grace gives. The Bible talks about giving to support the work of God, tithing to the local church as well as giving to the needy.
We are a people blessed by God. Many of us are blessed financially as well as spiritually. When we give we are displaying the grace of God to others. This applies when we give money, time, and resources, however! There is a blessing in giving our lives away in service to God and others!
Dave Ramsey says about Christians, “We live like no one else so we can live and give like no one else Meaning that we can live financially responsible so that we can live well and bless others to help them live well extending the grace of God.
Grace Is Not Perfection
I want to circle around to the verse we began with as we finish out our picture of grace as a characteristic of a godly woman.
“My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me.” (2 Corinthians 12:9 NASB)
Grace doesn’t come through willing myself to be perfect.
Actually, striving for perfection, power, and the love of others often leads me to sin.
The sin of control.
When I am trying to be all things and accomplish all things I am holding tight-fisted to the control in my life. While I acknowledge there are weaknesses in myself I am usually covering them up.
Maintaining control in my life is a sin because it makes me my own god. I obey my will, follow my desires, cling to my rights, lie to others about my flaws to keep them from seeing my mess.
Grace Vs. Control
This year, as I am struggling with the idea of accepting grace and extending grace to others I am forced to face the reality of the sin in my life. Most days I choose control rather than grace.
To make a change I had to come face to face with what each of these choices looks like and set up some benchmarks to see when I have gotten off track.
The difference between living with grace and living in control is like night and day.
The Controlling Woman:
- Is hard to live with
- Insists things be done her way.
- Becomes easily critical of herself and others.
- Grows impatient with herself and others.
- Tends to be harsh with her husband, children, family, friends, and co-workers for not measuring up to her standards.
- Regularly pointing out the negative side of things.
- Complains often.
- Works herself to the bone for the approval of others.
The Gracious Woman:
- Is not hard to live with.
- Honors the preferences of others.
- Shows understanding of the weaknesses of others.
- Actively displays patience toward others.
- Regularly encourages those around her to do their best, not her best.
- Genuinely looks for ways to be thankful.
- Expresses gratitude rather than complaining.
- Helps others instead of promoting herself.
A woman of grace lives in truth by acknowledges her weaknesses or at least not hiding them from others.
Showing Grace To Others Requires Giving Up Control:
- Control of how and when God changes us and others.
- Control of how well we can do things.
- And control of how other people do things.
Giving up control to God is a sign of gracious living.
Embracing my weaknesses because they show off God’s power is a sign of gracious living.
The gracious woman is a godly woman even though she is not a perfect woman. A gracious woman is a strong woman, wisely giving God control of things she really can’t control anyway. And the best way to determine if we are living in grace is to look at those lists in relation to the people who live with us or work with us each day. That is where we are most likely to be the real version of ourselves.
Related: 7 Steps to Thrive Through Forgiveness in Marriage
How to Become a Gracious Woman
How do we become a gracious person and let go of the controlling person?
We’ve already seen that we become a gracious woman when we are saved. The Holy Spirit comes to live within us at salvation giving us the grace that we need.
So why doesn’t it feel like we immediately become gracious women at the time of salvation? Growing in grace requires three things on our part.
- Knowing God more through prayer and Bible study.
- Time and practice.
- Living openly in the community of believers
Knowing God More
When we are saved God does so many amazing things in us and while He knows us, we know so little about HIM. God molds us more into His image daily.
- The more we read the Bible the more He works to change us.
- The more we pray the more He works to change us.
It’s a beautiful part of who God is. He changes us as we get to know HIM more.
God is relationship-driven. He cares that we know HIM more. He doesn’t just want us to look like HIM. He wants us in a relationship with HIM which only happens through prayer and Bible study.
“You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart.” (Jeremiah 29:13 NASB)
Time and Practice To Walk In The Grace of God
It takes time to developed our spiritual gifts. We have to be intentional to practice them.
The more we give up our rights and expectations to prefer others the more quickly grace will become a part of our character.
When we deny our desire for perfection and control we take another step toward gracious living.
Remember that when we, in an attempt to control life, hide our flaws we live in pride and slow the work of God’s grace to change us.
Part of practice will also be prayer – surprise. We grow when we pray. I have prayed many an emotional prayer, drawing nearer to God when life was hard.
A prayer for grace and peace goes a long way when God is stretching and molding us. A prayer for trials and tribulations will help us accept and show grace when those times come.
Walking in the grace of God requires a lot of prayer and practice which both require strength.
Living Openly in Community
“not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another; and all the more as you see the day drawing near.” (Hebrews 10:25 NASB)
The last way to grow in grace is by living in the community of believers. It is very challenging to grow alone because there is no one to help us or for us to help in the process.
When others see that we are not perfect they see that they do not have to be perfect to come to God. That is a woman of Grace, giving others permission to come as they are because she lives as she is.
What God is teaching me this year is that when I embrace my weaknesses God shows up and moves and He gets all the glory. We all grow when God is glorified through walking in the grace of God.
When others see where you are struggling they can more easily be the hands and feet of God to help you, bless you, support you, and encourage you in the journey as well. We miss such a blessing when we hide our mess because others have gone through that same mess and can help if we will only let them!
Related: 4 Reasons The World Needs Wives To Stop Being Fine
Will You Commit Walking in the Grace of God
I don’t know about you, but this year has brought out so many things in my character that I didn’t realize were there. While I realize I can be controlling I didn’t realize how controlling or perfectionists had become.
When I seek to control my life, I leave little room for the will of God to be at work in my life.
We’ve all be asking a similar question in this strange season of 2020. “How can we make sure there is more room for God to speak, direct, and move in our lives?”
The answer God has been putting in my heart is to begin Walking in the grace of God.
Embracing and extending God’s grace looks like letting go of that need to control everything, to always succeed, and be perfect. Acknowledging the weaknesses that God hasn’t fixed, healed, or removed in me and others and allowing Him to use them in any way He pleases.
Maybe God has left those weaknesses to showcase His power and bring us back to HIM.
That’s is the kind of woman I long to be – a strong woman of grace, living a life of grace and extending grace to others.
Walking in the Grace of God in Marriage
Embracing grace when I fail in my marriage and extending grace to my husband when he fails in our marriage is hard. I have to remind myself how hard it is to live with a controlling woman in order to walk in the gift of grace.
Walking in the Grace of God in Parenting
Parenting is another area where I need daily reminders to walk in God’s grace. I want to do my best for my kids, pass on a legacy of faith, and finish strong. What I’m learning however is that the more I strive for perfection the more my kids feel the weight of each mistake.
By walking in grace as a mom can better give my kids permission to mess up and grow instead of always feeling this pressure to do more, be more, and impress me. Grace in parenting is critical.
Walking in the Grace of God Toward Leaders
“Every person is to be in subjection to the governing authorities. For there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God.” (Romans 13:1 NASB)
Our leaders need us to show them grace. Whether it is our church leaders, our state leaders, our president, or our boss at work they are just flawed humans doing the best they can.
Stepping into a position of leadership comes with great responsibility and the Bible tells us that God actually appoints our leaders. We must give them grace when we see them fall short and make unwise decisions. Of course, we hold them to a higher standard, but we can’t expect perfection.
Giving grace to our leaders helps them avoid burnout and be better able to lead us in the long term.
Grace Toward Those Who Are Different
One of the many wonderful attributes of our world is that we are each different. There are people of every shade of brown (which is the color I think we all are when you look deeper), with many different languages, religions, and cultural differences.
Even among those who look similar, you will find different family backgrounds, traditions, and beliefs. We are all different.
Why do we distrust those who are different from ourselves? Differences make us beautiful. How boring would the world be if we all looked acted and believed the same?
God made us different and we should celebrate our differences. If we were walking in the grace of God we would better be able to enjoy each other and learn from each other!
This is the call I feel in my own life to help with the tension of inequality in the US today. Grace. Living in grace. Extending grace. Praying for others to embrace grace as we work toward the change we desperately need.
Let’s Choose to Begin Walking in the Grace of God Today
Walking in the grace of God is a choice. The steps to begin living more this way are simple.
- Understand God’s divine grace.
- Allow God to change what He wants.
- Accept grace daily.
- Allow grace to mature through practice.
- Release the need to control.
- Spend more time with God in prayer and Bible study and prayer.
- Live openly in the community with the body of Christ.
Let’s make the choice toward change today and see how God will move in our world!
in HIM
Tiffany of Hope Joy in Christ inspires Christian Women to grow in faith, live out Biblical Marriage Principles and raise Godly Children. Join the Wives Only Facebook Group here or keep up with her through Pinterest.
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