Do you ever worry your kids will resent you when they are grown? Or well before that as the Teen years approach? I worry about that so much. It fuels so many of my nightmares as a woman of Faith striving toward Biblical Motherhood. I don’t want to force my faith on my kids… What I dream of is the day they own their own faith and walk in wisdom! But as we embrace this Tween age Season I fear it’s a pipe dream. Can you relate?
Sweet Momma’, There is Hope! We can win them over and avoid Resentment – but it requires a long game strategy.
Enter Mentoring instead of Mothering as my game plan
How many times has your Tween Girl moaned “My life is over” as she storms out of the room? Ahem… how many times today!?!?!?!?! 12 times today and it’s only 10 AM. We are in the transition from little to Tween. She needs a different parenting style from me in this more mature stage. I have to Move from girl mom to mentor.
Titus 2:3-5 Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior, not malicious gossips nor enslaved to much wine, teaching what is good, so that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be sensible, pure, workers at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the word of God will not be dishonored.
Parenting comes in seasons and stages
When they are babies they need us to do everything. But as they take each new step toward adulthood they need to learn how to do everything for themselves.
I don’t know about you, but I am trying to hang onto those moments where they need me. Those moments are few and far between as they stretch for Independence and it makes me both joyful and sad.
- Sad that the sweetness of innocence is gone.
- Joyful to see the beautiful young ladies God created to shine for Him!
It is my pleasure to be a guest for LikeMindedMusings in this #RaisingGodlyGirls series!
Click here to Read More and find out:
- When do we Move from Girl Mom to Mentor?
- What’s the Difference between Mothering and Mentoring your Tween Girl?
- The Best Way to Move from Girl Mom to Mentor
The Best Way to Move from Girl Mom to Mentor + Giveaway!
Girls Created to Shine is a Great Mentoring Tool for Tween Girl’s
Personally, I love a deep Beth Moore Bible Study, but my Tween girl cannot stay focused that long. She needs a quick win in her Bible study time.
Girls Created to Shine is Fun, Fast and Relevant to her world! We absolutely loved it!
Girls Created to Shine is not all teach-y-preachy but it does cover real topics that girls face in today’s world. You can take it at your own pace and drag it out over the course of a year if you meet monthly.
We plan 1 or 2 Mentoring dates – away from the house in a fun setting. She loves sitting down for ice cream or hot chocolate while we chat. I love walking through a park while we chat. Either way is lots of fun and non-threatening to her.
It is So important to pick a Non-Threatening setting and to keep a neutral posture if she wants to talk about hard things!
There are Fun Girl Activities in the study which have Biblical Application. My Tween Girl’s Favorites (which she still pulls out to do together) are Smoothie Recipes & How to Give a manicure!
The Study is easy to use and relevant to her world which made it a Win-win for us! I highly recommend you check it out if you are a girl mom with children age 8-adult!
Is your Tween girl ready to Move into a Mentoring Relationship with you?
I have a Printable to help you get started down that path! You will both be blessed (and it’s not complicated – promise you can do it and God will equip you!)!
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Do you need some encouragement to keep pressing into that Daily Commitment to your Marriage? We could all use a community to help us in Reclaiming Hope & Joy in our marriages!
We just finished a 31 day Series to help us Reclaim Hope & Joy in Marriage by Intentionally Investing in our Christian Marriage. Get the articles Free in this downloadable e-Book. And Be sure to check out the Wives Only FB Group where Christian Wives chose Hope and Joy in every Season
in HIM,
Tiffany
I have twin girls getting ready to enter this phase of life. Technically they are tweens already, but I’m thankful they aren’t maturing as fast as some of their friends. They still like to be little, and that’s a-okay with me.
I only see glimpses of the little girl in my oldest. makes me sad some days but happy to see her growing into a Godly woman she is becoming!
This is very sweet. I don’t have daughters but this kind of stuff always interest me because my boys will be marrying someone’s daughter one day.
Love that perspective. And it totally applies to boys too. We love bible journaling with the boys – gives them something to hold and do while we study!
I love how you encourage mothers to mentor their daughters. So many moms don’t take an active role in shaping the spiritual lives of their daughters.
That is the calling we have a mothers!
Boy have I been there and done that. It is a bit of a tightrope being a parent and yet making sure you keep things open so they feel safe sharing who they are with you.
Great tip Alice!
Being a single mom for nearly a decade, I had the “privilege” to see the difference and what a dad can make. While I meant toward and mothered it was not until God sent the right man for us that I saw my daughter’s confidence shoot through the roof. Just a thought.
Love that perspective. A dad’s influence goes a long way!
Yes, thinking of the long game and teaching/mentoring to that is such an important parenting skill. Keeping the mindset that we are wanting to raise successful adults is a good perspective to keep. That doesn’t mean don’t allow our girls to be little but also not parenting in a way that we have to change or go back on what we say or how we parent as they get older is important.
exactly melissa!
Our oldest is in the middle of this phase. I’m so proud of her and the woman she’s becoming. Love this idea for ways to spend time together and mentor our growing girls!
It is so fun watching them grow up isn’t it!