I don’t feel like he loves me. He never listens to me anymore. Why is he always so distant? He never wants to be with me or the kids anymore. What happened to the man I fell in love with? How can I respect this man? These were common thoughts in my past. Can you relate to any of them?
Over and over I hear wives ask some variation of this question.
- Why should I respect my husband?
- He doesn’t deserve it.
- If only you knew the things he’s done (or hasn’t done).
- There’s nothing respectable about my husband.
Those are valid statements we speak from a place of longing and pain. I understand them because I have said them myself. For years I had no respect for my husband.
If I’m honest, I was afraid to Respect my husband
You see, I always understood Respect in a 20th Century American way. Respect as defined by Webster Dictionary is “a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements.”
Respect had to be earned and could easily be lost. Giving my respect meant accepting a person -every part of that person (faults and all). I thought of it as a personal endorsement that reflected on me directly.
He doesn’t seem to give any loopholes or stipulations. This is one of very few direct commands given to wives specifically.
Ephesians 5:33 NASB “Nevertheless, each individual among you also is to love his own wife even as himself, and the wife must see to it that she respects her husband”
Our Marriage was no Fairy-tale – even from the beginning. After nearly a decade we were at the end of our rope.
Do you need some encouragement to keep pressing into that Daily Commitment to your Marriage? We could all use a community to help us in Reclaiming Hope & Joy in our marriages!
We just finished a 31 day Series to help us Reclaim Hope & Joy in Marriage by Intentionally Investing in our Christian Marriage. Get the articles Free in this downloadable e-Book. And Be sure to check out the Wives Only FB Group where Christian Wives chose Hope and Joy in every Season
Today’s article is a Guest Post at MsLoTanner’s spot. Lo Tanner is an Alaska grown marriage and lifestyle blogger. She is a wife and mom of three and has a passion for equipping wives thrive in their faith, marriage, and goals
Today’s article is an excerpt from the Marriage Course Finding Hope and Joy in My Marriage. This self paced course is for Wives Only -teaching us to live in our Marriage from a Biblical Worldview.
The Course is laid out in 9 Modules with a Video Lesson to introduce the topic and a downloadable workbook.
- Inside the workbook are 5 days of work for you to do – just you and God.
We will walk through the topics of:
- That is deeper than lip service
- Desires Vs. Preferences
- And how they war
- My Mouth
- Why & How we can tame it
- Appreciation & Admiration
- The best ways to use our words to create momentum in our Marriage.
- The Leader
- Who is it and how do we actually make that a reality.
- Understanding Men
- What does this really mean and how can we accomplish it?
- My Priorities
- Setting them to make the best Future for our Marriage
As a Bonus, when you sign up for the Intermediate Plan
- You will be paired with an accountability partner who will be there to talk to when the days are hard.
- You will have lifetime access to a Private Facebook group where you can connect with other like minded Wives.
- I will be hands on in the FB Group to answer questions and pray over needs as they arise.
When You sign up for the Advanced Plan you will have a Mentoring Call with me about week 4 to talk through the hard things and plan ways to resolve those issues you are really battling!